i'm getting the sense (from life in general, not from this post) that we all adopt narratives that serve us, and tweak them as we go, as needed, and that's fine. right now i would say, "quitting twitter helped me, but therapy and the right pharmaceuticals made the difference" in terms of getting out of a recent depression -- even though it's not like i was new to either therapy or pharmaceuticals.
in the sense you're describing, i don't think something you choose to do is less "your choice" just because it's something you "have to do." you could absolutely find a way to not do it. but more importantly, you are choosing to adapt to the consequences of this new mandate. you are using YOUR brain and willpower for that. even if you think you're just following an order, complying requires you to create the means of doing so -- a bunch of other, smaller choices, which are also yours. you do get credit for them. 1 credit = 1 piece of accepted evidence that you have positive agency and autonomy. the bank = your self-esteem. putting it in the bank = internalizing it. using it for what purpose = there will be times when you doubt it and need to check your account balance. the bank metaphor breaks down because you can't withdraw or spend this knowledge, but the point is we all need to accrue it. otherwise, stuff just happens to us, we (think we) never change, and there's no material with which to construct any other narrative. u feel me?
I had this exact morbid fantasy in the opposite direction! I was convinced getting severely but non-fatally hit by a car would let me go to sleep for like a month or two and not be bothered and then I'd be perfectly ready to sort my life out afterward. But ingesting less twitter and more things that are not twitter is part of why I'm here in the first place, ha.
"But then (I reason) I do not really need to bow to necessity. And indeed many people don’t in similar circumstances. They keep on carrying on the way they have been, whether they get away with it or not"
Oh man. I was trying to think of what Samuel Johnson idea this reminded me of, & the closest I got was "Perhaps every man may date the predominance of those desires that disturb his life and contaminate his conscience, from some unhappy hour when too much leisure exposed him to their incursions; for he has lived with little observation either on himself or others, who does not know that to be idle is to be vicious. [And he has logged off Twitter who has merrily forgotten about stupid beefs.]" Anyway maybe Boswell remembers what I was thinking of.
I can help you get kicked off twitter
i'm getting the sense (from life in general, not from this post) that we all adopt narratives that serve us, and tweak them as we go, as needed, and that's fine. right now i would say, "quitting twitter helped me, but therapy and the right pharmaceuticals made the difference" in terms of getting out of a recent depression -- even though it's not like i was new to either therapy or pharmaceuticals.
in the sense you're describing, i don't think something you choose to do is less "your choice" just because it's something you "have to do." you could absolutely find a way to not do it. but more importantly, you are choosing to adapt to the consequences of this new mandate. you are using YOUR brain and willpower for that. even if you think you're just following an order, complying requires you to create the means of doing so -- a bunch of other, smaller choices, which are also yours. you do get credit for them. 1 credit = 1 piece of accepted evidence that you have positive agency and autonomy. the bank = your self-esteem. putting it in the bank = internalizing it. using it for what purpose = there will be times when you doubt it and need to check your account balance. the bank metaphor breaks down because you can't withdraw or spend this knowledge, but the point is we all need to accrue it. otherwise, stuff just happens to us, we (think we) never change, and there's no material with which to construct any other narrative. u feel me?
Same, I went back on Twitter bc I had a brief spate of fun, and now it's just misery
I had this exact morbid fantasy in the opposite direction! I was convinced getting severely but non-fatally hit by a car would let me go to sleep for like a month or two and not be bothered and then I'd be perfectly ready to sort my life out afterward. But ingesting less twitter and more things that are not twitter is part of why I'm here in the first place, ha.
"But then (I reason) I do not really need to bow to necessity. And indeed many people don’t in similar circumstances. They keep on carrying on the way they have been, whether they get away with it or not"
All That Jazz (1979)
Oh man. I was trying to think of what Samuel Johnson idea this reminded me of, & the closest I got was "Perhaps every man may date the predominance of those desires that disturb his life and contaminate his conscience, from some unhappy hour when too much leisure exposed him to their incursions; for he has lived with little observation either on himself or others, who does not know that to be idle is to be vicious. [And he has logged off Twitter who has merrily forgotten about stupid beefs.]" Anyway maybe Boswell remembers what I was thinking of.