the word used in my circle to describe this kind of thing, which you've magnificently described imo, is "queerhet." a straight relationship patterned in a queer way. a word more frequently used *by* queer people, but not exclusively. i'd also say it's a term that is properly used to describe relationships in fiction (e.g. mulder and scully), not a word describing real people (though it applies here because we're talking about the fictionalized Taylor) -- but, of course, inevitably it spills over and gets cheekily used to describe real, lived situations too. and very honestly i think part of the reason all the queer people i know (including me) love using this word is because it implies a queer cultural ownership, or at least a queer cultural origin, of something that (as you also cogently point out) *many straight people really want.*
for me personally at least, i feel like it's good for everyone if straight women explore and express this stuff. i guess i've never really thought about whether the possibility of these feelings being labeled 'queer' is good or bad or a deterrent or whatever. i kind of think it's beside the point. the position of agency and authorial vantage in relationships (real or fictional) is something women are long overdue. so get it, girl
the word used in my circle to describe this kind of thing, which you've magnificently described imo, is "queerhet." a straight relationship patterned in a queer way. a word more frequently used *by* queer people, but not exclusively. i'd also say it's a term that is properly used to describe relationships in fiction (e.g. mulder and scully), not a word describing real people (though it applies here because we're talking about the fictionalized Taylor) -- but, of course, inevitably it spills over and gets cheekily used to describe real, lived situations too. and very honestly i think part of the reason all the queer people i know (including me) love using this word is because it implies a queer cultural ownership, or at least a queer cultural origin, of something that (as you also cogently point out) *many straight people really want.*
for me personally at least, i feel like it's good for everyone if straight women explore and express this stuff. i guess i've never really thought about whether the possibility of these feelings being labeled 'queer' is good or bad or a deterrent or whatever. i kind of think it's beside the point. the position of agency and authorial vantage in relationships (real or fictional) is something women are long overdue. so get it, girl
i can't promise the next post won't also involve taylor swift unfortunately but we are going to get this ship righted eventually 😭
I’m here for it.
she's got an album dropping on friday… after that maybe we're in the clear…………